We've Been Married 22 Years. Apparently Now We Argue About Bears.

🎙️ From the Podcast

This conversation began in Episode 159: Impossible Hypotheticals Every Couple Will Argue About.

Reese's answer to one ridiculous hypothetical quickly turned into a debate about friendship, loyalty... and whether one of her friends could actually beat up a grizzly bear.

▶ Listen to the full episode

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I learned something about Dave because of a grizzly bear.

Which is not a sentence I thought I'd ever write.

We weren't actually talking about a real bear, obviously. We were answering one of those ridiculous hypothetical questions.

The question was this:

Would you save your friend from a grizzly bear if it meant it rained on you for the rest of your life?

Dave answered almost immediately.

"Yes."

Meanwhile, I'm over here thinking...

Hold on.

Which friend?

Because if it's my friend Jen, she's gonna beat the bear.

I'm not even worried about Jen.

I think Jen would make the bear apologize.

Dave kept telling me I was missing the point.

I still maintain that he was missing the point.

Here's the thing.

Everybody thinks hypothetical questions are about finding the right answer.

They're not.

They're about figuring out how the other person's brain works.

Dave heard:

"Would you sacrifice something for someone you love?"

I heard:

"Who exactly are we putting up against this bear?"

Those are two completely different conversations.

Both valid.

Only one involved proper bear strategy.

We've Run Out of Normal Things to Talk About.

One of the funny things about being married for a long time is that eventually...

You know all the stories.

You know how your partner broke their arm.

You know every terrible job they ever had.

You've heard about the weird uncle.

You've met the old roommates.

You've discussed retirement.

You've argued about the thermostat.

More than once.

So now what?

Apparently...

You argue about bears.

Or wizards.

Or whether you'd spend your entire life standing under your own personal rain cloud.

Fine.

Let's talk about the rain.

People online are probably thinking, "Wow, Reese really picked her hair over saving her friend."

First of all...

Rude.

Second...

Have you ever paid for a Brazilian Blowout?

Do you know how much time and money goes into convincing my hair not to become a human Q-Tip the second humidity shows up?

I had literally just bought a new raincoat.

This matters.

Also, I never actually said I wouldn't save my friend.

I simply pointed out that some of my friends stand a much better chance against a bear than others.

I feel like that's just critical thinking.

The Best Part Isn't the Answer.

The best part is listening to someone explain themselves.

Because that's when the weird stuff comes out.

You find out who's practical.

Who's emotional.

Who's competitive.

Who's looking for loopholes.

Who's willing to spend $100 to become more attractive.

Who's only willing to spend fifty cents.

And somehow, you always learn something you didn't know about the person you've been with forever.

So Here's My Challenge.

The next time you're sitting on the couch scrolling your phones because neither of you has anything interesting to say...

Ask something ridiculous.

Would you rather have a pet dragon or a teleportation device?

Would you live underwater if you could still order takeout?

Would you fight one horse-sized duck?

I don't know.

Pick something impossible.

You might spend twenty minutes laughing.

You might accidentally start an argument.

You might discover your spouse has been secretly evaluating which of your friends could survive a bear attack.

And honestly?

That's a much better Tuesday night than asking what's for dinner.

Although...

If it's linguine with white clam sauce, I'm in.

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Continue the Conversation

Okay, settle this for me.

Does context matter?

Because I still think it does.

🎙️ Click the "Send a Voicemail" button on the right side of the page and tell me what you'd do. We just might play your voicemail in a future episode of Manic Joy.

🎧 Listen to Episode 159: Impossible Hypotheticals Every Couple Will Argue About

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